Since it rained like Hell, you might think that Pen Argyl's annual Labor Day parade was postponed. Think again. It's the largest annual parade in Northampton County, if not the Lehigh Valley, and the show must go on. Politicians are there in force, even if they know they're going to get drenched. They use it as an informal gauge of their popularity. It's in Ron Angle's district, by the way, and he certainly has taken a few hits over the last year. But judging from the way the crowd reacted, he's on his way to re-election.
Prior to the parade, Gracedale Goons were hoping for the worst. "[L]ets [sic] see if KING ANGLE gets the unkind reception this year that he got last year at the Labor Day parade in Pen Argyl." Only one of them, Mary Ann Schmoyer, was even there. Considering all their complaints and promises and discussions about billboards and ridding the County of the "tyrant," it was a pretty poor showing.
Angle did get the usual boos. This year, they mostly came from people swilling from beer can insulators supplied by Angle's opponent, Scott Parsons. But Ron tells me this year's reception was actually above average.
Riding in the float in front of Angle was none other than Northampton County's very own Controller, Barron von Footinmouth. He's up for re-election this year, too, and was tossing tootsie rolls to the kids. Maybe he should have worn his kilt. His shirt was too small and his pants were too big. As a result, every time he dipped into the candy bag, another inch of ass crack popped out. I tried to get a shot, but my batteries were dead. Besides, I don't have a wide angle lens.
Now imagine you're some kid, waiting for the candy toss with an umbrella turned upside down so you can get even more. Then imagine that you see Barron von Footinmouth's gigantic ass crack, followed immediately by what look like tootsie rolls. Are you really sure they're tootsie rolls? Neither were the kids, and they just remained on the street until they were hosed into the drains at the end of the parade.
Imagine poor Angle, too. For the entire race, Barron's ass was right in Ron's face. Angle has survived worse, but his son's girlfriend had to be rushed to the hospital and is in critical condition.