Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Severson Scissorhands Has a Date ... in Court

After a gazillion continuances and hundreds of mini-judges, big shot political consultant Severson Scissorhands - who makes switch blades as a hobby - finally has a court date on June 5 at 9AM before District Judge Ralph Litzenberger. Severson was charged in March for disrupting a funeral mass by flipping off and threatening Northampton County Council member Ron Angle.

Word has it that the state AG is taking this matter seriously, and has already denied Severson ARD, a special program for first offenders. And Litzenberger is one tough cookie. I once tried to fight a burnt out tail light before him, and he sentenced me to twenty years in the electric chair.

I have two words for Severson - rubber underwear.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

I predict the Judge throws out at least two - possibly three of the charges.

Anonymous said...

Severson clearly has photos of Morganelli with farm animals, mink handcuffs and motor oil. Why else would John refuse to address Scissorhands' dastardly deeds. Morganelli is as decent as the trash he blows around the gutters with.

Bernie O'Hare said...

Anon 9:11,

You never know what's going to happen until it happens.

Anon 9:15,

Morganelli is the most accessible DA in Pa. He hangs with me. He'd even hang with you. And those mink handcuffs are mine!

Anonymous said...

Morganelli refered this case because he had a conflict. You and Corbett could learn something from him. As for Litzenberger he's going to see this for the nonsense it is and send most of it packing.

Anonymous said...

This is Disorderly at best. Severson should plead guilty to Disorderly. Wait, Corbett won't let him. Definitely ARD right ? Nah, Corbett said no to that. Corbett is a political prosecutor right out of the Rove playbook.

Anonymous said...

This is Disorderly at best. Severson should plead guilty to Disorderly. Wait, Corbett won't let him. Definitely ARD right ? Nah, Corbett said no to that. Corbett is a political prosecutor right out of the Rove playbook.

Bernie O'Hare said...

My own assessment is that one of Severson's biggest problems isd his arrogance - his belief he can do anything. For years, he has waged vicious campaigns, violating elections laws, and no one would prosecute. Thanks to his funereal behavior, that's about to change. He is bad for democracy. If John Morganelli wants to be AG, he needs to keep his distance. It's going to be a close race, and he needs to appear top be squeaky clean. he is derided the AG for authorizing an agreement with an outfit that effectively campaigns for candidates without registering as a PAC. He is right to be concernced, but Severson himself makes those folks look like boy scouts. His funeral antics are the least of his problems.

Pale Rider said...

Isn't it ammazing how Anon 8:11 has all the facts and heard all the testemony and can sit as judge before the prelimary hearing... What a putz!

Anonymous said...

Angle provokes another outburst and as usual runs after he stirs the soup. These charges will be gone, maybe disorderly conduct stays. The best would be to lock Severnson and Angle in a cell together overnight.
Let the two bozos beat on each other, my money is on Severson. Angles a blowhard in front of a big group, but one on one he is a runner.

Bernie O'Hare said...

Yeah, it's all Angle's fault that Severson disrupted a funeral mass.