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Nazareth, Pa., United States

Monday, November 27, 2017

This Eagles Boycott is Killing Me!

I often hit a bar on Sunday afternoons. No, I'm still sober. I have no TV and go there so I can watch the Philadelphia Eagles. But not this year. I'm boycotting them. Not because Authoritarian Donald Trump tells me to, but because I'm a jinx. Just as I'm often the kiss of death when I predict victory for a politician, I've noticed that the Eagles tend to lose games that I watch. Even if I just listen to Merrill Reese's always-entertaining play-by-play, they lose. So I stopped watching or listening. Since that time, the Eagles have been undefeated.

This is killing me.

If they suddenly start losing, you'll know why.

While I'm here, I might as well share my top Eagles memory. It has nothing to do with the on-field action.

I went on a bus trip to see them play the Redskins many years ago. My son and daughter were with me, too. So were a neighbor and his kids.

Today, our kids would be taken away from us. 

That was the very first time they were having Magistrate's Court right at the Vet stadium, back in 1988. . There had been sixty fist fights at just one game, one Eagles fan shot a flare gun and some guys were urinating in sinks.  Future Supreme Court Justice Seamus McCaffery brought Eagles Court to restore the rule of law.

Well, the crime problem likely was the result of everyone sneaking in all kinds of booze. Inside shirts, jackets, pockets. They even loaded up little kids with Miller Lite, just like drug mules. Because I was no longer drinking, I was viewed as a beer distributor, and was weighted down with so many cans that I could barely walk.

No metal detectors or wands back then. We showed them our ticket and we were in,even though a can fell out as I walked by.

My son and his best friend loved the scalpers and would return in later years and figure out ways to get in for free.

As we sat there, some obviously-loaded guy in front of us got up and was yelling about this and that play. The young daughters who were with us were unable to see, and I asked the fellow to sit down.

"Fuck you!" was his answer.

Then he complained that our group had cans of illegal alcohol all over the place, which we did. A security guys came and said, "I don't see anything" even though one of my friends was holding a can.

A few minutes later, our adversary pulled out some of the things that he had smuggled into the stadium himself. This included a six-pack and a hoagie that looked very good. Then he pulled out a knife to cut the hoagie in half so he could share it with his wife, who seemed like a very nice lady.

"Oh my God, he's got a knife!" I shouted.  "There are children here!"

Let me tell you, within about three seconds, security people were dragging this guy away.  They came from everywhere. Some of them actually jumped up from the playing field and hauled this poor guy off to Seamus McCaffery's court. His wife and the knife went with him, too.

That left the hoagie, which I ate.

The guy and his wife did return to their seats late in the fourth quarter, minus the knife. Judge McCaffery  apparently decided the matter lacked prosecutorial merit. The guy did apologize for his foul language to me and the young ladies who were with us.

In exchange, he and his wife were offered a beer.

Fortunately, he never asked about the hoagie.

31 comments:

Anonymous said...

The NFL decided to pick a fight against America. Bad move. Wait til the paycheck reality hits these morons right in the ass

Anonymous said...

Fly Eagles Fly

Bernie O'Hare said...

Could we see an Eagles-Steelers Super Bowl?

Anonymous said...

You have to love anon 12:07, the right wing media blows the whistle and these clowns salavat5e like Pavlov's dogs.

I love watching football and have no sane reason to stop.

Anonymous said...

Possible.
Less likely given the trouble they had putting away Green Bay last night.

Anonymous said...

NCAA Football stadiums are full to overflowing this season. NFL stadiums are sparsely attended. Life no longer stops for football on Sundays even though most of these seats were bought and paid for this season. I would hope that a lot of these people would not go back to buying tickets for next season, especially since I don't see the league doing anything about the Players disrespecting our nation.

When the NFL goes bankrupt the NFL millionaires will go back to raping and their various thuggery. Remember the video of one NFL player pulling his wife out of the elevator by her hair after beating she shit out of her? And the unsolved murder in Atlanta in 2000 after the Super Bowl that Ray Lewis bribed his way out of?

Anonymous said...

NFL = WWF in my opinion.
Just play the game like you were hired and expected to play and everything would be fine. College and HS much better product.
If I want to watch dancing ,celebrating and other BS on the "shows" playing floor , I'll watch Dancing with the Stars instead.
Could you imagine Nascar doing the things that the NFL does. Every time a driver passes another, they get on top of their car and do a dance, or when they are first out of the Pits , they do donuts!
Piss poor sportsmanship as well in the NFL . Look at the fights yesterday.

Anonymous said...

College football is now FAR better than any NFL game. Especially the SEC Conference. Although one college JERK scored a TD and then got down on all fours and lifted his rear leg to simulate a dog relieving itself. THERE'S the future NFL player!

Anonymous said...

mediocre teams due to free agency and salary cap. sloppy play due to limited practice and no-contact rules. penalties on almost every play. injuries on almost every play. idiot players who perform celebratory dance routines for minor accomplishments - even when they're losing by two touchdowns. the game was unwatchable and ratings were sliding long before national anthem protests gave additional incentive to turn off games.

Anonymous said...

Who sits at an Eagles game?

Anonymous said...

I used to watch 3 to 4 games a week. I did this for 20 years. Now, I watch my team and then I enjoy the rest of my days and night and don't worry about it anymore. I don't watch the pre-game shows because it's all banal ex-player speak and adds no enjoyment to the game I'm going to watch. I can get all of the same info in 2 minutes online than I can from watching 2 hours of pregame shows.

And it's not just ONE thing that has caused the shift in my habits. It's a totality of all the bs that has gone on over the last few years and I just don't care anymore. Ticket prices, the secondary ticket market, Personal Seat Licenses, concession prices, the fans behavior at games, the endless commercials, the bad behavior of the players, the unfair punishment system the NFL keeps changing for PR reasons, Roger Goodell, the awful football games, the fighting, etc., etc., etc. And I'm not sure if everything changed to my liking if I'd ever be as invested. I was a season ticket holder to the Phillies in 1993. Baseball went on strike in 1994 and I haven't paid for a MLB ticket since.

Mark Cuban, a blowhard of the nth degree, said that the NFL was becoming a hog ripe for the slaughter. I think he may be right.

Anonymous said...

Why did Bernie's funny anecdote become a forum for old blowhards yelling "get off my lawn" to the NFL? The Trump dogwhistle perhaps?

Anonymous said...

I went to Penn State and support my college team. Screw the Eagles. I expect a 10-20% decline in season ticket holder renewals if something drastic does not happen to stop this stupidity like getting rid of the commissioner and having a new one set down the law..no more politics at the games, period.

Professional football players are performers, and people don't want to hear their political views or give a shit about them.

Bernie O'Hare said...

Yawn. Not interested in these OT rants inspired by your authoritarian leader. This post is for people who want to talk about the Eagles. I will be deleting you from this point.

Anonymous said...

Anon 946 nailed it. Give it a rest people, enjoy a funny story and call it a day.

Bernie O'Hare said...

"NCAA Football stadiums are full to overflowing this season. NFL stadiums are sparsely attended."

This is just an out-and-out lie. It's bad enough that Trump can't speak without lying, but his supporters do the same thing as respect for the truth diminishes. In fact, NFL attendance is up this year, but it won't be until next year before we know whether you wackos have affected sales. Now go away. http://www.businessinsider.com/nfl-attendance-not-hurt-by-protests-yet-2017-11

Anonymous said...

I very much love my Eagles. I don't like all the attention and hype they are getting, but that is unavoidable. There are still 6 games left, a lot can happen.

Very happy Sh*ttsbburgh beat Green Bay last night. I wouldn't want to see Aaron Rodgers in playoffs.

Robert Trotner said...

This is hilarious!

Anonymous said...

Aaron Rodgers is on the DL and will likely not be back until next year. The NFC East is a dumpster fire, except for the Eagles. They're very good and Wentz is the real deal. But they've only beaten a couple of teams over .500 and they finally start playing tougher competition in these last few weeks. This isn't their fault, as nobody expected the Cowboys and Giants to be the disasters they are. The Eagles need home field advantage. The Saints and Vikes are also very good. But neither of them can seem to win a road playoff game. This is the year we'll see an all-PA Superbowl, provided the Steelers get home field and don't have to try to win the conference in Foxboro.

Anonymous said...

Steelers have zero chance.

Anonymous said...

The Eagles are flying indeed. As a lifelong Philly sports fan, I keep quit because I know how thing s can go bad very fast. This year does look great. Keeping fingers crossed.
Sorry Bernie but you do notice most of the angry posts seem to go out of their way to mention the actions of African-Amerio9can players. Many references to "thugs" and other such right-wing media slogans. It is sad that the POTUS will focus on a sport and not the state of needs of the nation.

Anonymous said...

I like the racists who see thug and immediately begin virtue signaling to cover their own hate. Eagles and Steelers. Bet it.

Anonymous said...

African-Americans are the ones protesting racism so the "slogans and words" used are aimed at them. The slogans of the alt-right have no effect on thoughtful people.

Anonymous said...

Meanwhile, most of those NFL thugs have double the IQ of the posters here.

Anonymous said...

I like the racists who see thug and immediately begin virtue signaling to cover their own hate. Eagles and Steelers. Bet it.

Yeah, it doesn't work that way, Pepe.

Anonymous said...

"virtue signaling" What the Hell is that??
Is that another fake news term from our friends on the alt-right?

Bernie O'Hare said...

"Steelers have zero chance."

They are my second most favorite team, after the Eagles. I'd love to see an Eagles-Steelers Super Bowl with Big Ben and Wentzylvania. Philly teams have a tendency to choke, and I sure hope this does not happen. Also, the Steelers have to get past New England.

Ron Karasek said...

Bernie:
I also decided to stop watching or listening to Eagles' games for the same reasons you have. Every year I say to myself "This is the year" so I start watching or listening and the losses begin!

Bernie O'Hare said...

Hi Ron, So this Sunday, let's egg the other Ron's house. By the time we post bail, the game should be over.

Bernie O'Hare said...

" This is the year we'll see an all-PA Superbowl, provided the Steelers get home field and don't have to try to win the conference in Foxboro."

I like your prediction.

Bernie O'Hare said...

"Who sits at an Eagles game?"

I stand from time to time, but not non-stop. That's why you have seats.