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Nazareth, Pa., United States

Friday, December 20, 2013

A Shit Blockade?

I've told you before that Ron Angle has pissed off about 100,000 Upper Mount Bethel residents. It's Shit Wars! He wants to spread shit on three of his farms, and they say his shit stinks. The Sierra Club's Don Miles thinks it might even be radioactive, and that is certainly true if it's Angle's shit.

In the latest act of aggression, though there's supposed to be a cease fire, the shit haters have blockaded a road to one of Angle's farms with all kinds of signs and rocks.

Even though he owns it. And radioactive Don has sent Angle a missive, by certified mail, claiming that he's trespassing.

Don is a lawyer, too.

It's at trying times like this that I miss Ross Kahler. Before he passed on to the Great Outhouse in Florida, Kahler was Northampton County's Open Space Guru. More importantly, he was the area's leading expert on shit. Not only did he spread it on his Bushkill Township farm, but he testified in a few cases about the differences between pigshit, chicken shit, bullshit and just plain shit.

Unfortunately, Ross developed radiation sickness after he started using Angle's shit, and is no longer with us. He moved off to Florida.

After eight years as County Exec, both Glenn Reibman and John Stoffa have been certified as bullshit detectors. But courts won't let them testify because they are also carriers.

As an award-winning broadcast journalist, I'm going up there this morning to see and chronicle the shit blockade. If I survive, I'll give you a full account on Monday.


Anonymous said...

Speaking of shit, what's the latest shit on the John Brown cabinet? Usually rumors run rampant but this one is on lockdown. Not even bullshit is seeping out.

Everyone knows the Republicans are better than Democrats at being tight-lipped and secretive but Holy bullshit, this is wild.

Have you heard anything?

Unknown said...

State agricultural laws trump local control of sludge spreading activities. Only the State can regulate these activities. UMBT has no viable legal recourse. Area residents should test their wells for fecal coliforms.

Anonymous said...

Bernie I spoke to Ros Kahler yesterday. He's living in Florida for the winter and very much alive.

Bernie O'Hare said...

I have made that more clear.

Anonymous said...

Rolf, is was not posted because you are a troll and Bernie has banned you.

Anonymous said...

The guy knows his shit. Having lived in a rural area for many years, the bouquet of human shit is far less offensive than bull or chicken shit. The aroma of chicken shit is startling. Worse than any is fish-based fertilizer. It's stench is otherworldly.

Yours in Christ,
Regular in Plainfield

Anonymous said...

I am glad Ron Angle is focusing his shit spreading powers to his own land. for years he spread his shit over all the residents of Northampton County and it was pretty bad. Now he just wants to spread his shit on his farm. That is a great idea and spares the rest of us the stench.

Soon John Stoffa will be out of county government. Angle should enlist Stoffa's help and between the two of them they will not be stopped. Their combined power of spreading shit is unconquerable and Ron will live happily in his shit covered farm.

Anonymous said...

I have to hand it to you Bernie - you talk shit like nobody's business. I'm glad you're on this story - no one else could get into like you do.

Connor O'Hare said...

The Norco Bulldog has more integrity and intestinal fortitude than all of you nitwits combined, if it wasn't for dinosaurs like Jolly Joke Timmer we would still have him on the airwaves of Sunny 1100 where he could verbally castrate some of you reprobates with his razor sharp wit. I'll bet half of these comments are from RMM who is a disgrace to all Marines.

Anonymous said...

Old shit spreading Angle. His reputation is well earned.

Anonymous said...

The folks in the SlateBelt have always thought of Angle as a SHITHEAD so whatever..... whatever comes out of his butt is same as out of his mouth

Anonymous said...

That shithead Ron Angle is endangering all the adjoining properties to his farms. Where innocent,healthy, hardworking families live with their children and pets. Listen up people ,where are your ethics. Do you really think sludge is safe.Become aware of this issue.People will become very sick. people who's live will never be the same because of its toxicity. How Would you like people to come in shit in your yard just because they can!!Pretty rancid I think!!