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Nazareth, Pa., United States

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Kathy Frederick Remembers Catholic Grade School

Kathy Frederick, who's smart enough to stay away from political topics, has a nifty little blog called The Junk Drawer. She's really having fun, too. If you're looking for a little bit of humor from someone who doesn't take herself too seriously, do yourself a favor and check her out. I loved her "Scary, Hairy Chocolate-Covered Cherry" story, but she topped herself today with a story about her days at Catholic grade school. Here's a small sample.

Fact 1: I had to wear a plaid uniform every day, which could be worn only with a white blouse, white or green socks, and sensible shoes. The only thing that made you unique was the length of your skirt. The popular girls always wore them short, short, short!

Fact 2: My skirt was one of the longest of any girl’s in the school. The rule was “Hemlines below the knee.” The only Moms who followed that rule were mine and the mother of a girl who went on to become a nun.

Fact 3: I wore glasses from kindergarten to third grade. To jack up the ridicule quotient, I also had to wear a patch over one eye to improve the strength of the other, though thankfully, not during school. But I was still known as the poor little Pirate Girl by people who saw me wear it.

Fact 4: I had kinky curly hair and tried to wear it as a shag. I have pictures of how this looks, but they’re in a safe-deposit box where they can’t hurt me anymore.

Fact 5: The first four letters in my last name were M-E-S-S, which lent itself to some interesting name-calling by all the mean girls, as in “Kathy, did you mess yourself today?”
My Catholic grade school experience was similar to what Kathy tells us. I had to wear those damn plaid skirts, too. Having BO as my initials didn't help much, either.

12 comments:

Gort said...

Is that a picture of the virgins the suicide bombers will meet in heaven?

Anonymous said...

Bernie -- Thanks for the link and your glowing recommendation. I still find it hilarious that you have me sitting there in your blogroll among all the blogs talkin' about much more weighty topics. I think I'm some kind of palate-cleanser.

LOVE that nuns-with-guns picture!

Chris Casey said...

Bernie! I see you found the staff picture from my old Elementary school! Now you know what extremes they went to to keep me in line!

Bernie O'Hare said...

Junk Drawer (Kathy),

No, I have to thank you! You raise the level of writing for all of us, so you must have learned something from Sister Mary Petunia. I don't think those of us writing about politics are really writing about matters that are any more lofty than those hairy cherry candies you covered so well.

The serious writing is about sports. That's where you better know what you're talking about.

Anonymous said...

Ah, brings back memories of my beloved (?) first-grade nun, Sister Charles Bronson of Our Lady of Perpetual Terror. I quickly learned that the rest of the Dirty Dozen handled (commanded) the other seven grades (2-3 classrooms per grade full of 30-35 kids each in a major U.S. city, and never a major behavioral issue. Anyone surprised?)

Anonymous said...

Say, I bet those Nuns are on staff at a Catholic High School in Philly!

Bernie O'Hare said...

The nuns I remember didn't need no steenkin' rifles.

Chris Casey said...

I think I saw these Nuns at an NRA meeting!

Anonymous said...

Wore the plaid, taught by the nuns, dealt with the rules, itched about it like everyone else and turns out that some of the best people I know were right there with me. Funny how that happened. Here's to the ladies in black and white!!

Anonymous said...

I remember too...grades 1 thru 4 in Catholic school was great experience. Nuns w/o guns were strict but fair.

river said...

I never went to a Catholic school but some more strict teachers in schools today sounds like a good thing to me.

Anonymous said...

As a 1-8th grade, old-school nun vetern, they would indeed be a new reality to todays students. In the nun world justice was swift and hard. Appeals were unheard of and if you told your parents you would just get it again.

My fav was Sister Mary Axehandle of the Holy Order of Welts.