NorCo's New Cell Block

In their latest attempt to destroy morale, Northampton County Executive John Brown and his Human Resources Lieutenant, Amy Trapp, are poised to adopt a new county policy that bans personal cell phone use, except when employees are on breaks and away from their work area. This is a solution to a nonexistent problem. Much like the punch card fiasco, which Brown is obviously waiting until the election to force on workers, all this does is ruin morale.

SHRM advocates a reasonable approach. "Employees may carry and use personal cell phones while at work on a sporadic basis. If employee use of a personal cell phone causes disruptions or loss in productivity, the employee may become subject to disciplinary action per company policy."

Brown and Trapp at first appear to adopt this common sense approach:

"While at work, employees are expected to exercise discretion when using personal electronic devices. Excessive personal calls, emails, or text messages during the workday, regardless of the type of device used, interfere with employee productivity, are distracting to others, may be unsanitary and, in some cases, could present safety concerns in the working environment."

But right after telling you to exercise discretion, you're told that cell phone use is banned.

"Employees are prohibited from using personal electronic devices during work time, and may only use these devices during scheduled breaks and lunch periods. Additionally, the use must occur only in non-working areas. At no time are mifi devices [like WiFi] not issued by the County of Northampton permitted to be used to boost signals for personal devices while in County owned buildings."

In addition, it is apparently now a capital offense to be caught carrying one.

"Employees’ personal electronic communication devices are to be kept secured in parked vehicles, kept in locked desk drawers, or in lockers where available."

This is overkill. Some businesses like Fed Ex ban cell phones completely, but most public and private employers take a more common sense approach. If it is distracting, it must stop. If it hinders performance, it must stop. Department heads will talk to employees who spend their entire day on the phone. There is no need for a four-page policy that in essence treats the county's most valuable asset, the workforce, as though they are little children.

What is the cell phone policy like where you work?

Updated 9:40 am: Hokie Joe, one of my readers, warns that the last place to keep a cellphone is in a parked car: "Here is my recent experience..... To leave your cellphone in a locked vehicle is ASKING FOR TROUBLE. Cell phones are heat sensitive and the batteries can ignite and cause severe damage to your auto as well as destroying your phone and possibly injuring an innocent by-stander. Look at your instructions on your new phones. I recently left my cell phone exposed to the sun while wading in a local creek and when I picked up my phone, it wouldn't work. I went to Verizon with the problem and they explained the heat sensitive issue. When the phone heats up to a higher temperature than your body temperature it will not respond to your touch since your body temperature is lower than the battery temperature. DO NOT LEAVE YOUR CELLPHONE IN YOUR AUTO WITH ALL THIS SUMMER HEAT."

Driving Under Influence of Cell Phones Now Illegal in Bethlehem

Driving under the influence of hand held cell phones will soon be illegal in Bethlehem. In fact, you won't even be able to phone in a take-out order from your scooter or bicycle. By a 5-1 vote on May 19, Bethlehem City Council effectively ruled out any use of hand held cell phones while driving, whether it's for talking, texting, emailing or even playing tetrix. This Ordinance goes into effect on June 15, with a warning period that will extend until August 15. That coincides with the last day of Musikfest. After that, it's a $100 fine. Chronic offenders (six times) will be assessed $500.

David DiGiacinto, the sole Council member to vote against this ban, ironically helped draft an amendment to make it stronger. He proposed banning any "interactive wireless communications device," which could include laptop computers, PDAs or any electronic device that sends and receives messages, including cell phones.

Talking with a hands-free device is still permissible, and even hand-held cells may still be used for emergencies or if you pull over to the side of the road.

Before the vote, Bethlehem resident Don MacRae told Council that the real problem is distracted driving, which could even include noise. He pointed to a noise ordinance that bars car radios that can be heard 40' away, but complained it's never enforced. Other Bethlehemites, however, supported the measure. Al Bernatos called it "proactive", while Dana Grubb applauded it as sending "a message to state officials."

On City Council, DiGiacinto explained his opposition by simply stating he considers the Ordinance illegal. But Council member J. William Reynolds argued enactment might spur the state into finally adopting a statewide ban. "I do think there's something to be said for putting pressure on the state," he noted.

Philadelphia, Erie, Harrisburg, Allentown and Wilkes-Barre are other cities that have imposed a prohibition on the use of hand-held cell phones while driving, but currently, there is no statewide ban. The state House did adopt a comprehensive ban in January, but there has been no action in the state Senate. According to Council member Eric Evans, that might happen as soon as June 15, but Reynolds speculated that this legislation could also be used as a tool in state budget negotiations.

Local AAA spokesperson Theresa Podguski has told me that only seven states, including the District of Columbia, bar the use of hand-held cell phones while driving. Twenty-four states make text-messaging while driving illegal, and twenty-seven states limit their restrictions on cell phone use to teens.

Podguski maintains that no studies show that the use of hands-free phones actually offers any safety advantage over hand held phones. "It's the conversation that's the distraction," she said. AAA only advocates a texting ban.

The Ordinance also provides for signs notifying the public to put their cell phones away while driving. But Council member Reynolds, noting that the cost of signs throughout the City could run anywhere between $2,000 to $15,000, asked Mayor Callahan to hold off on signs in the hope that a statewide ban is imposed sometime this Summer.

Council President Bob Donchez, who spoke last, provided the most compelling reason for a ban. "If we save just one life, it's well worth passing this Ordinance tonight." Donchez, a former teacher, told Council that 7 or 8 of his students were buried as a result of tragic automobile accidents.

"If there's a challenge, so be it," he concluded, referring to the very real possibility that this a city ban on hand-held cell phones is pre-empted by the state Vehicle Code.

That bothers our local District Attorneys, too.

Northampton County District Attorney John Morganelli told me, "I believe that the ordinance is unenforceable due to preemption. There is at least one judicial decision, I believe in Bucks County, stating the state ONLY has authority to legislate in the area of motor vehicles." As a result, Morganelli refuses to use his prosecutorial resources to pursue violations. "I have advised the City Solicitor that I would authorize them to act on behalf of the Commonwealth in any summary appeals resulting from enforcement of the ordinance, and they have authority to prosecute summary matters in the District Court level," he stated.

In Lehigh County, District Attorney James Martin expresses reservations as well, but is willing to test the legality of the Ordinance in Court. "When Allentown recently passed its ordinance, I said I would let the court decide. I took that position because even though I think the ordinance is in conflict with the uniformity provisions of the Vehicle Code and will be found to be unenforceable, no court except the Bucks County Court of Common Pleas has so held. That decision has no precedential significance in Lehigh County. Further, the Vehicle Code is silent as to cell phones; so there is presently no conflict between the ordinance and state law (arguably)," he said. He cautioned that if a cell phone ban statute is adopted by the Pennsylvania Legislature, that will trump any local ordinance. "At such time I would not enforce the local ordinance. I think there are strong public policy reasons to have a uniform state law in both of these areas. Bethlehem did ask for my opinion and I told the clerk I would be consistent with what we are doing in Allentown. Obviously, if the Lehigh County Court of Common Pleas declares the ordinance illegal, it will not continue to be enforced, and I will so direct the Police Department," he concluded.

In other business, City Council approved the sale if a 1.5 acre tract of land located along Silvex Road to Colleen T. Miller. She agreed to pay the appraised price of $13,500, although county assessment records place the value at $14,700.

Now Wilkes-Barre Wants to Ban Cell Phones, Too!

The Downside to Pulling Over For a Cellphone Call

Pennsylvania's most recent attempt to impose a ban on hand-held cell phones went down in a very close vote in April, mostly along party lines. But it's coming. So I've been pulling over lately if I get or receive a call while driving.

I should just turn the damn phone off. Yesterday, on my way home from the courthouse, my cell phone started ringing, so I pulled off along the side of Tatamy Road to take the call along some freshly cut grass. I was just off the road. Honest.

Unbeknown to me, I drive right into a groundhog's living room. He must be a rich groundhog, too, because that was one deep hole and there was no way I would get out.

I inconvenienced police officers from both Tatamy and Palmer Township, who were mystified that a sober person could drive off the road and right into a hole. I'm unsure they bought my cell phone story. A tow truck eventually pulled me out.

Worst of all, this happened in my brother's truck. My Jeep recently died after 210,000 miles, and he has let me use his old truck until I find something. Don't tell him.

Fortunately, there's no law against being an idiot.

The Cell From Hell

Scientists call it the cell from hell. It's a one-celled organism that can morph from plant to animal to attack anything in the water, even you. It lurks in sewage infested water to release a toxin that shreds flesh while destroying both immune and nervous systems. Fish gladly hurl themselves ashore, preferring suffocation to the agony inflicted by this little monster.

As horrifying as this indiscriminate killer may be, it's not what most of us think of when we hear the expression -- "cell from hell." We think of cell phones, the latest technological success to enslave us.

Joe Brennan is a man on a mission. You see, he's in a 4 way fight to get the Democratic nod for the state assembly. And even if he wins, he'll have to face Dawn Berrigan in the Fall. So now he's promised that, if elected to the state legislature, he'll introduce legislation to ban people from using hand held cells while driving. Who knows, maybe Northampton County Council will amend its Code of Civility to regulate cell phone use.

I'll admit I used to detest people who are always on their cells -- at restaurants, movies, in cars, even on the john. Ever stand in an express checkout line behind some lady with 48 items who talks nonstop on her cell while fishing for a minuscule credit card inside the bowels of a 100 lb. purse? Or overhear some guy telling some girl from his cell what a nice night he had while he's sitting on the throne of a public restroom?

But now that I have my own cell from hell, I realize those poor slobs, like me, are really just slaves. I got my cell about two years ago, convincing myself I need it for my business as a title searcher. True, the Recorder of Deeds office already has about 1,000 phones and I don't get any calls in the middle of the night for emergency title searches, but you never know. Now, three cell phones later, I actually have 4 separate cell accounts for various family members. And I can see now that it's really important to answer that ring, even on the john. Yes, I am plugged in, even when I am plugged on. I have Internet service and even had one of those earpieces that make you look like a Secret Service agent, but lost it.

Here's the problem. Once you make the mistake of getting a cell and giving someone your number, you better answer that phone when whatever goofy ring tone you've preset starts to go off. (For me, it's the Mexican Hat Dance.) If you don't, be prepared to get the third degree from whoever called you.

This explains why so many women talk on their cells while they're driving. Unlike men, they don't wish to be rude, and feel compelled to answer when that phone rings. They go through stop signs, turn without blinkers, and commit numerous other traffic offenses, completely oblivious to the dangers of the highway. The other day, I decided to count them as I approached my job. EVERY woman on the road was talking up a storm. And then a fellow title searcher, who happens to be male, drove by and screwed up my entire theory about unsafe women drivers.

He was reading the newspaper!

I'm not sure whether talking on the cell phone while driving is as unsafe as some of the other things we do on the road, whether it's reading Bill White's latest column, gobbling down a slice of pizza, or singing along with the Beastie Boys. But Joe Brennan still has a great idea because it gives me an excuse to ignore that phone.

"Where were you? I called 28 times!"
"Sorry, Joe Brennan made it a crime for me to answer the phone while driving. I could be executed."

Anyone who gives me an excuse for ignoring my cell phone gets my vote. Now I don't live in Joe's district, but I'm voting for him anyway. I'm a Democrat and we do that sort of thing.