I suffer from allergies at this time of year, and as I've grown older, they get worse. I missed the ballot challenge hearings on Friday because, quite frankly, I was coughing a bit too much and thought it would be rude to other people. I was MIA, but my evil Republican brother was there. He had filed a challenge himself, and though the nice lady he attacked so unfairly decided to withdraw, elections officials suggested he be there because you never know. While he was there, he sat in on a few of the hearings. What impressed him? It was not the lawyers, not the deputy sheriffs or even Judge Dally. Of all things, it was the frickin' tipstaffs.
He was gushing about them as he spoke to me last night. He told me they are by far the most important people in the courtroom. They show you where to stand, where to sit and keep the cases moving while being nice to everyone.
As he as leaving, he complimented them. "You're awesome!" he said to one of Judge Dally's two tipstaffs.
She looked at him quizzically, then said, "Well, I wish you'd tell your brother because he thinks all we do is run around and get coffee for the judges.!"
"You really should try to be nicer," he implored me.
"Are you sure you're an O'Hare?" I responded. "It's bad enough that you've come out as an R, but since when have O'Hares ever been nice? We're as mean as catshit! If Dad were still alive, he'd disown you!"
I am truly disgusted. I have spent my adult life making sure that the public equates the name O'Hare with miserable bastard. And my brother ruins everything by going to church all the time and being nice to people.
By the way, I never once said that all tipstaffs do is run around and get judges their coffee. That is a damn lie. It was my buddy Ron Angle who said that. I said they are glorified butlers. And that was back in 2010.
So get it right!
9 comments:
Be kind to the people you meet on the way up, because you're gonna meet the same people on the way down. - Ralph Kramden
All good and well but who was kicked off?
It’s the best gig in the world. They all are collecting a pension from their first job. They’re salaried, but work less than part-time. The really sweet part is that they get County benefits including health insurance for them and their families. You’d be nice too Bernardo. Maybe when McClure gets elected judge he’ll reward you with one.
Your brother might require reincarnation to balance you out
To clarify: Benie's brother is very nice person and Bernard is actually a nice, if misguided person too.
I agree with your brother. Over nearly 40 years of finding myself in State and Federal courtrooms this side of the Susquehanna River, I enjoyed my time with tipstaffs waiting for court to start. I made it a habit to arrive early, sometimes at least a half hour before the appointed time, sometimes before the doors to courtroom were unlocked, and sometimes staying overnight the night before to prepare my case and to arrive on time without the stress of traveling through traffic delays and bad weather.
Because most tipstaff knows the judge personally, many for years before they got their gigs with the judge, they are valuable sources of intel on their bosses and other lawyers, where to sit (in some courts the defendant sits closer to the jury as opposed to the plaintiff sitting there), where your case is on the list, what verdicts were rendered recently, and what not to say, e.g. housekeeping when addressing the court.
They also have interesting stories from their lives before they retired and became a tipstaffer. Many are former law enforcement and teachers. Many are well known to those who will serve on the juries or be a litigant.
Once you learn their names, along with the judge’s stenographers, law clerks, and sheriff’s deputies, you can reference them by name which shows your familiarity with the court and a certain control of the courtroom. It also doesn’t hurt if your friendliest and effort gets back to the judge that you are a nice guy.
^^^ this guy lawyers
Tipstaffs do provide a "personal" connection to the judges and the legal process. Admittedly off topic, but could you please provide an update on Norco DA overtime story. Thank you.
My uncle was a member of Judge Grifo's tipstaff. Uncle J often fell asleep in court but knew and was helpful to all (when he was awake). ;)
Post a Comment