Pit Bulls No Longer Featured in Mafia Wars

It's been months since I've played Facebook's popular Mafia Wars. Apparently, they intended to introduce virtual pit bulls as a new class of weapon, but had second thoughts after the virtual Mafiosos objected, as noted in this recent blog from Change.

I was unaware "that pit bulls consistently pass standardized temperament tests with flying colors, several points above the average score for all breeds. Pit bulls across the country also work as therapy dogs, including many who had been abused or previously owned by dog fighters."

Apparently, the real bastards are those damn Dachshunds. My Dad had one, named Ursula, who hated everyone but him. Once, Judge Hogan dropped by and Ursula decided to be nice to him. He was petting her, and she was wagging her little tail. Little did he know she was just luring him in. The second he turned his back on her, she bit him right in the ass, tearing a nice hole in his trousers.