Mezzacappa is unable to find some important papers, and as night follows day, it's obvious that either I or a West Easton Borough Council member must have slithered into her house, evaded her attack pig, and taken these items, leaving other valuables untouched. Completely logical.
Oh yeah, she complains that I'm a stalker, too.
She ends this matter by kicking the investigating officer off her porch.
It's not me. Honest! I always leave a Pink Panther glove during my heists. It must have been O.J.
Here's a link to the police report. (Because loading the reports here tend to slow down the site, I have stopped embedding them in this blog, and have links to them instead.)
Mezzacappa: Bernie the Burglar
14 comments:
What a sad story. She must live a tormented life.
The rich get richer at the expense of the poor. Shame on you Mr Butz and son .
Does the pig have the imprint of your size 13 Bruno Mali shoe in its ass?
You don't like pigs. You've flaunted your contempt by showing numerous photos of your grandson irreverently hauling a dead one around a football field.
Meanwhile, there are real crimes being committed, and these officers are spending their time dealing with this.
does your pig bite....
I still say the Borough of West Easton and the City of easton should sue her for costs associated with frivolous calls for service. Maybe she should sit on county council with the rest of the clowns that actually voted to approve an unbalanced budget!
sounds like the pig is smarter than she.
The most complimentary definition is a female dog.
Further defined as: aggressive, assertive, domineering, overbearing, strong-minded, spiteful, hostile, obnoxious, thick-skinned, hard-headed, vicious, dogmatic, competitive, pushey, loud-mouthed, independent, stubborn, demanding, manipulative, egoistic, driven, overwhelming, threatning, scarey, tough, brassy, boisterous, and turbulent, among other things. A True Bitch occupies a lot of psychological space.
This one also occupies a lot of the Easton Police Department's time on idiotic complaints and wastes the West Easton Taxpayers money.
WEST EASTON RESIDENTS WAKE UP!!!
Tell your Borough officials to direct their solicitor to contact the Easton Police Department about bringing a criminal misdemeanor charge against Mezzacappa. Her conduct is a clear violation of Section 4906 of the PA Crimes Code, False Reports to Law Enforcement Authorities. Mezzacappa had "no information" upon which to base a report of theft, and the report turned out to be false.
O.J. did not kill anyone. His son did. The true story is that the son asked O.J. for some money to buy fast food. O.J. wouldn't give it him and said, "go ax your Mom."
Let's see. Earl the pig was home alone. The paperwork was gone but Tricia's jewelry was still there. Earl is a resourceful pig and can open and close doors. He needed to eat twice a day. More likely than a break-in is that Earl wanted a third meal and he ate the paperwork. Pigs will eat almost anything, including garbage. Also, Earl may still have been pissed at Tricia for going away with Bernie O'Hare on August 26 and coming home "trashed." Hell hath no fury like a pig scorned!
If Bernie kicked Tricia's precious pet pig on Aug. 26, why didn't she become enraged and order Bernie to leave her residence immediately? Here's what she says she actually did. She agreed to go walking with Bernie, who drove her to the walking trail in what she calls his "death wagon." Why didn't she insist on separate cars? After the walk why didn't she have second thoughts and demand that Bernie take her home so she could check on her injured pig? Instead, she agreed to go out to dinner with the alleged pig kicker. At the restaurant she says Bernie "began plying me with beer after beer" until she was drunk. Apparently, she could not say no to the free beers. Bernie has his faults, but I don't believe hurting pigs is one of them. If the pig ain't hit, you must acquit!
Thats not what the pig said.
Post a Comment