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Monday, February 23, 2009

Who Hit Me With an Ugly Stick?

Some of you may wonder why I've been changing my profile picture on a near daily basis. The answer to that question should be obvious. I annoy the hell out of a lot of people. It's a gift. So I could say that frequent changes to my profile picture protect my privacy and security and lessen the probability that I'll be whacked.

But that's not the real reason. I'll let you in on a little secret. The truth is I am one ugly mo fo. Need proof? One of my many admirers snapped a photograph of me at Allentown's House of Chen last year and used it in a flattering post about me yesterday. I've stolen it and have reproduced it here. Now, I never really took a good, close look at me before. But I think even Father Alex will have to agree that God has not been kind to me. What the hell was He thinking? Geez. By the way, that dark stuff on my arms is not dirt. It's hair. Damn, that's more hair there than you'll see on any orangutan.

So all I have left is my charm.
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18 comments:

  1. Blah SocietyFebruary 23, 2009 at 12:09 AM

    So all I have left is my charm.

    And your jeep... you can't forget about that!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bernie O'HareFebruary 23, 2009 at 12:13 AM

    The babes love that, you know.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sanctifying GraceFebruary 23, 2009 at 12:13 AM

    We've all been made in the likeness of our Creator.

    Bernie, there should be a ballon bubble coming from your mouth in that picture saying,

    "Notre Dame #1!"

    Peace be with you, ~~Alex

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bernie O'HareFebruary 23, 2009 at 12:16 AM

    Father Alex, I was showing everyone my sprained finger. It's not what it looks like.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Blah SocietyFebruary 23, 2009 at 12:24 AM

    The babes love that, you know.

    I remember that day that you drove me to the debate. All the ladies were looking at us... come to think of it, everyone was looking at us...

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousFebruary 23, 2009 at 12:56 AM

    You are even uglier than Angle and Dertinger.

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousFebruary 23, 2009 at 1:10 AM

    Must be cold, I can see you are wearing a sweater under the shirt.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousFebruary 23, 2009 at 7:47 AM

    Boonie, I agree with you. You are not pretty !

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousFebruary 23, 2009 at 8:29 AM

    You have more chins than a Beijing phone book. Back on the bike with you!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Bernie O'HareFebruary 23, 2009 at 9:49 AM

    Does that mean I get to change in the courthouse bathrooms again? Oh, goodie.

    ReplyDelete
  11. J. SPIKE ROGANFebruary 23, 2009 at 11:27 AM

    Man your hairy!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Bernie O'HareFebruary 23, 2009 at 11:28 AM

    That's why I'm called O'Hare.

    ReplyDelete
  13. AnonymousFebruary 23, 2009 at 2:01 PM

    "Father Alex, I was showing everyone my sprained finger."

    ...including your "grandson," who was standing next to you, so embarrassed by you he didn't know which way to run...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Patrick M. Coughlin, Attorney at LawFebruary 23, 2009 at 5:17 PM

    thankfully, between the "O'Hair" gene, and my father's own personal brand of hairiness, I somehow escaped with what could only be referred to as a light covering of fur.

    i imagine it will get worse before it gets better though...

    ReplyDelete
  15. AnonymousFebruary 23, 2009 at 6:24 PM

    Uh oh, a new "Stepford Boy."

    ReplyDelete
  16. Sanctifying GraceFebruary 23, 2009 at 6:30 PM

    Mr. Villa,

    Can you please explain to me (in small words) how you are being provoked? Because I think that I am missing something. ~~Alex

    ReplyDelete
  17. Sanctifying GraceFebruary 23, 2009 at 9:51 PM

    Testing, testing. one. two.

    Picture one - above -
    Father Alex

    Picture two - this one -
    Father Alec

    Who wins???

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousMarch 12, 2009 at 2:44 PM

    bernie,
    what you lack in looks, you've made up with brains..... the ladies still LOVE you!!!

    ReplyDelete

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