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Wednesday, July 26, 2023

God Punishes Me For Trying to Show Off

I've told you several thousand times that I'm a highly conditioned, well-trained athlete. I rode my bike to meet someone for lunch at Nazareth Diner. After that, I planned to ride to Gracedale and shame everyone else for driving there and ruining the planet. There's a few hills, but it's a short ride. It was a great opportunity to show off. 

When I left the Diner, I noticed the skies were getting dark and I could hear some rumbling. It will pass, I told myself. That lasted about a half mile and then it started. Not a faint light drizzle. Lightning was crackling all around me, the winds reduced my speed to about 1 mph and hail battered me. I was actually hoping someone would hit me so I could hijack their car. 

I arrived at Gracedale looking like a sewer rat, soaking wet, and my shoes squeaked wherever I walked. 

Nobody seemed to notice, probably because I always look like a sewer rat. 
I should have driven. 
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5 comments:

  1. pathfinderJuly 26, 2023 at 6:10 AM

    Not a true cyclist until you get rained on at least annually.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousJuly 26, 2023 at 6:52 AM

    These are the kind of sacrifices one makes to honor and restore Gaia, if you keep this up Comrade Terra might eventually forgive you for the Dutch oven treatment you subjected her to in that elevator.

    BLU BaDGEr

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousJuly 26, 2023 at 7:32 AM

    You Bernie have had your sins washed off by GOD. GOD knew you were riding your bike just to shame people that barely make enough to even pay for gas.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bernie O'HareJuly 26, 2023 at 9:45 AM

    "Not a true cyclist until you get rained on at least annually."

    I misjudge at least twice a year, lol. It was actually fun.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousJuly 27, 2023 at 12:45 AM

    Your song should be "Raindrops keep falling on my head." 🌧🤣

    ReplyDelete

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