This time, I was supposed to pick up a friend in Scranton and bring him. Unfortunately, he must have read the story about my first road trip because he called that morning and canceled. He said he had leprosy. He must have figured I would use him as a fall guy in case my last trip created any problems.
On my weekend trip, I avoided the tolls and took Rte 115. This time, I took the turnpike and found it took longer. When I arrived in Wilkes-Barre, I turned in at Wilkes U and began asking kids where the gym is located so I could find a parking spot.
"The gym's right there," said a student, pointing to a building across the street. Adjacent was a parking lot. I would not have to walk forever. But it charged $15. I asked the attendant whether he was serious, and he told me that rate only applied if I stayed past 11 pm. I was able to park for $2.50, and walked across the street to the gym.
It was the wrong gym.
I was at the local Y, not Wilkes U. That gym was about a mile away. Once again, I had a long walk. But I am a highly conditioned, well trained athlete, and I hoofed it. When I finally arrived at Wilkes U's gym, which is called Mars Hall for some reason, I noticed numerous empty parking spots. I could have parked right by the gym!
Once I got inside, the first half of the men's game was nearly over. They had started early, without waiting for me.
When the buzzer sounded, I began talking to the Wilkes U fans.
"Can you name any notable alumni?" I asked one.
- "Not really."
"Haven't you heard of Lamont McClure?"
- "That dude from Sanford and Son? I had no idea.!"
I also spoke to one of the natives.
"Is it pronounced Wilkes-Beara or Wilkes-Berry? I've heard both"
- "It's Wilkes-Berry, named after two members of the English Parliament."
"That's not really a very catchy name. Nothing like Bethlehem. You ought to change it to attract more tourists and business. How about Dingle-Berry?"
After the men's game was over, the coaches were in a pretty good mood because they had won, so I decided to offer my services.
"Coach, I have 16 years of eligibility and am ready to play."
- "We'll keep you in mind," I was told. So I got that going for me.
I left before the women got underway and began walking to my car. After about 20 minutes, I ended up at Mars Hall. I was lost. I was only able to find my car by plugging the local Y into my GPS.
I also used the GPS for the quickest route home, and ended up for about 20 miles on some dark, windy and narrow road, with my ears popping as I went up and down the mountains.
Next week, the team is playing away in Hoboken.
Bernie,
ReplyDeleteIf you have an iPhone, load the Waze App. Extremely helpful and better than most GPS units (for example, it alerts you to where the police are located along your route - something you probably need).
Don't know if it will direct you to the nearest toilet, however. Some of us have better control than you.
I never understood why the locals were seemingly unfazed by the mice living in Dan Flood's nose. Weird place.
ReplyDeletehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dan_Flood
Nothing can possibly go wrong in Hoboken lol
ReplyDeleteDocRoc, Will do. The app to the nearest toilet is the Wizz app.
ReplyDeleteI nearly s--t myself reading this. Next time take an airplane flight.
ReplyDeleteSounds like you ended up on Laurel Run Rd. I have to go up to Wilkes Barre a couple of times a year to visit our regional office. I never take the turnpike. I'll go up 33 and either get off at Saylorsburg and take 115 the entire way or take 33 to 80 and then pick up 115.
ReplyDeleteHank_Hill
It is so nice a grumpy old fart like you travels to support the team and your family. I can say this because I am an old lady fart.
ReplyDelete