Today's one-liner: "The shortest way to the distinguishing excellence of any writer is through his hostile critics." Richard LeGallienne
Local Government TV
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Thursday, August 04, 2016
Killer Geese
On Sunday, when I visited Ron and Sharon Angle for a really good chicken dinner. He's a great storyteller. But I have to tell you my own story about his bodyguards.
They're geese. Nasty, bad-tempered, ugly, loud and very fat. One is named Bernie.
Sure, he has barbed wire and armed sentries. Yes, there are vicious guard dogs on constant patrol. Those can be managed. Not guard geese. They know me and don't like me. I have to run from the car and hope Ron or Sharon answers the door or I'm done.
I was telling Controller Steve Barron about this earlier in the week and he mentioned a relative who also had geese and they were just as mean. Those guys figured out how to twist off the valve caps on car tires, after which they would let the air out.
Diabolical.
I know Canada geese get nutty when they have goslings to protect. But this is some other kind of killer goose. My own experience is that the little bastards go right for the jewels.
In the vidoe above, some poor businessman is murdered by a goose on his way to work..
19 comments:
You own views are appreciated, especially if they differ from mine. But remember, commenting is a privilege, not a right. I will delete personal attacks or off-topic remarks at my discretion. Comments that play into the tribalism that has consumed this nation will be declined. So will comments alleging voter fraud unless backed up by concrete evidence. If you attack someone personally, I expect you to identify yourself. I will delete criticisms of my comment policy, vulgarities, cut-and-paste jobs from other sources and any suggestion of violence towards anyone. I will also delete sweeping generalizations about mainstream parties or ideologies, i.e. identity politics. My decisions on these matters are made on a case by case basis, and may be affected by my mood that day, my access to the blog at the time the comment was made or other information that isn’t readily apparent.
Having a tic tic and blueberries as genitals must be a great natural defense against the geeses groin attack!
ReplyDeleteGo away, Tricia.
ReplyDeleteThe best way to cook a goose is in a crock pot.
ReplyDeletethe geese are dems - full of shit, probably sleeper muslims
ReplyDeleteThe fact that these invasive poop-bags are protected and cannot be killed per federal law is yet another way the government has failed the people with over-regulation. These overpopulated and worthless things are the bamboo of the animal world.
ReplyDeleteBraun has resorted to putting these one dimensional predators on their property to ward off these nasty flying rats.(the link is safe)
ReplyDeletehttps://goo.gl/photos/BXcqNf5UYbG7Nsgv8
But is is gone now, my guess is the geese ripped it to shreds and are using it for their nest.
"James," Don't know where you are getting that information bc most species of goose are NOT protected and may be hunted. Some goose has probably tricked you. They are quite evil.
ReplyDeleteThe bamboo of the animal world!!!! LOLOLOL!!!! That is so damned funny.
ReplyDeleteMy kid's elementary school's playground was essentially declared a disaster area a couple years ago after the geese laid down several layers of poop everywhere the eye could see. The kids had to have indoor recess for a month or more.
Goose droppings do contain bacteria harmful to children, and the winged fiends no doubt targeted that school for extinction.
ReplyDeleteI know that guy!
ReplyDeleteBernie,
ReplyDeleteThis was a gut buster this morning, butt this afternoons reading has added and you now have two wrapped into one?! This shit slinging stories strike again, and as for the wrinkly old jutbag let it go join the circuses little tent out back with the gloryhole gathers?! Than again bernie she could also join the ticket takers cheeZefry creators?!
RE:publican redd no party affiliatin
Canada's most revolting export to the U.S.
ReplyDeleteDEAREST Bernard,
ReplyDeleteSTART BY REMOVING ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN YOU ARRIVE AND HEAD TO THE DOOR. THE GEESE WILL SEE THE CAPITOL LETTER "Q" WALKING ACCROSS THE LAWN AND BECOME SCARED AND RUN THE OTHER WAY.
"Canada's most revolting export to the U.S."
ReplyDeletenah. the Biebs.
True. The Biebs music resembles goose poop.
ReplyDeleteGood story. I spent a lot of time on relative's farms. They al had a few geese as sort of watch dogs. People would always hear dogs barking but when the geese whet wild you knew something was up. They are aggressive and will chase and peck at you. If you are not into dogs and are Ok constant shit, they make great property guards.
ReplyDeleteThe Goosing King!
Was that guy in the vidieo carring some of the circus snakeoil that he suffered such a brutal attack by goose?! He most likely sold some to one or all of of the gooslings as they were not in pic?!
ReplyDeleteHilarious!!!!!!
GEESE LIVES MATTER!
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
DeleteALL LIVES MATTER!!!