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Saturday, March 22, 2014

Cunningham Fired at LVEDC

Photo taken by former LV Ramblings intern Peg Ferraro
After being caught fraternizing with a bottom-feeding blogger on Friday afternoon, LVEDC CEO Don Cunningham has been summarily terminated.

"We have standards, damn it!" explained Board member L. Charles Marcon. "We could put up with the Springsteen concerts, but this is too much."

In another emergency meeting, the National Museum of Industrial History, known as the NMIH and not to be confused with the NIMH (National Institute of Mental Health) has hired Cunningham at a salary of $5,000,000 per year.

"Let's see what Morganelli does now!" said Board spokesperson L. Charles Marcon.

Some idiots will actually believe this, but I couldn't resist.

Peg Ferraro actually did take that picture. But I fired her as my intern because I'm much more handsome than I appear in that picture. They say the camera adds ten pounds. "You must have eaten ten cameras," Cunningham told me.

I was sleeping soundly Friday morning when suddenly, the bottom-feeding blogger beacon began to shine from South Side Bethlehem. Governor Corbett was coming to town. Cunningham, Peg and a host of other big shots were there.

I hopped into my $500 Blogger-Mobile and made it. I was the only person there who hadn't shaved. ... Or showered.

The Governor's press person allowed me to remain even though I had no credentials except for the "Award Winning Broadcast Journalist" card I had a friend make up for me a few months ago. A state trooper with the Guv' was giving me the "I'll take you down to Chinatown" glare, and i don't blame him. But Corbett and the Sands CEO were cool as hell.

I'll have the straight story later today.
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3 comments:

  1. michael molovinskyMarch 23, 2014 at 2:50 PM

    as a conservative i was going to vote for corbett, but, since he apparently showed you some respect, wolfe will get my vote.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bernie O'HareMarch 23, 2014 at 2:59 PM

    I told him I know you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousMarch 23, 2014 at 3:43 PM

    And they all call me crazy? Bernie gives me the only gut busting laughs in years and MM is on the job to bring the circus sidshow freaks out from behind the curtins of the bigtop? They always look at us in that way as ignorance overtakes?

    redd
    patent pending

    ReplyDelete

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