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Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Blogger Knocked Off High Horse on Hexenkopf Road

Yesterday a reader suggested I was up there on my high horse. But sadly for me, I was actually knocked off that high horse on Friday night.

I had dinner at a friend's home on Hexenkopf Road in Williams Tp. Yes, this is the Hexenkopf that translates to "witches head." Hexenkopf Road just may be the scariest place in the Lehigh Valley. It leads to Hexenkopf rock, reputed "meeting place of witches, who congregated to sing, dance, and plot vengeance against the townsfolk. The rock has a number of legends connected with it, covering everything from ghosts to disappearances to suicides."

Sometimes I walk along that empty road, and it's pretty damn scary. I've seen menacing turkey buzzards refuse to leave a carcass in the middle of the road as I pass by. And it becomes eerily quiet as I force my way up a steep hill. Abandoned homes can be seen here and there, and I start wondering why these folks left.

My friend's home is nothing like that. It's warm and cheery and the meals are always great. But when I left the house to get to my car on Friday night, it was so pitch black I couldn't see. And as I trudged my way up a hill, I lost my footing, and smashed both head and nose against one of the many Hexenkopf rocks. Before I lost consciousness, I thought I heard a cackle and glanced at the black robes of a coven. Or were they judges? Or the Lehigh Valley Greens? Or Nazareth Borough Council? Or Northampton County Council?

Actually, I just tripped. Fortunately, my head broke my fall. Doctors thought my nose was broken until I told them it was actually that large before I fell. Now I'm going to have a nice Frankenstein scar, which I actually think is pretty cool. And I have an excuse for being ugly.

I can also tell people I got my scar sword fighting or something. Now if you'll excuse me, I have an unusual urge to eat raw meat.
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9 comments:

  1. Chris CaseyNovember 14, 2006 at 7:34 AM

    Tell the truth, Ohare, you botched using your do it yourself plastic surgery kit!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bernie O'HareNovember 14, 2006 at 9:42 AM

    Chris, You told me I was so cute last week.

    ReplyDelete
  3. addictedNovember 14, 2006 at 10:55 AM

    Maybe you stumbled into Bonnie Dodge's secret Lair!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bernie O'HareNovember 14, 2006 at 11:03 AM

    If Bonnie had gone after me, I'd be dead.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousNovember 14, 2006 at 2:58 PM

    Hahaha, that's the best pic on the web! Hope you're alright dad.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Bernie O'HareNovember 14, 2006 at 7:33 PM

    Hey Buddy, As you know, I'll do anything for a little sympathy, but these bastards are laughing at me.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Bernie O'HareNovember 14, 2006 at 7:34 PM

    Spike, You think your watewr bills are high now? Wait 'till I get done talking to Mitman.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousNovember 20, 2006 at 8:04 AM

    They're called Turkey "Vultures" not Turkey "Buzzards." Buzzards are hawks; Vultures are vultures.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Bernie O'HareNovember 20, 2006 at 8:11 AM

    I stand corrected. Thgese were vultures.

    ReplyDelete

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