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Nazareth, Pa., United States

Monday, July 11, 2016

Black Police Officer "I am Now More Likely to Die"

Jay Stalien, a police officer at Palm Beach County in Florida and a former Baltimore cop, writes eloquently and from his heart on the tragedy of black lives lost, not to cops, but to other blacks.

I have come to realize something that is still hard for me to understand to this day. The following may be a shock to some coming from an African American, but the mere fact that it may be shocking to some is prima facie evidence of the sad state of affairs that we are in as Humans.

I used to be so torn inside growing up. Here I am, a young African-American born and raised in Brooklyn, NY wanting to be a cop. I watched and lived through the crime that took place in the hood. My own black people killing others over nothing. Crack heads and heroin addicts lined the lobby of my building as I shuffled around them to make my way to our 1 bedroom apartment with 6 of us living inside. I used to be woken up in the middle of the night by the sound of gun fire, only to look outside and see that it was 2 African Americans shooting at each other.

It never sat right with me. I wanted to help my community and stop watching the blood of African Americans spilled on the street at the hands of a fellow black man. I became a cop because black lives in my community, along with ALL lives, mattered to me, and wanted to help stop the bloodshed.

As time went by in my law enforcement career, I quickly began to realize something. I remember the countless times I stood 2 inches from a young black man, around my age, laying on his back, gasping for air as blood filled his lungs. I remember them bleeding profusely with the unforgettable smell of deoxygenated dark red blood in the air, as it leaked from the bullet holes in his body on to the hot sidewalk on a summer day. I remember the countless family members who attacked me, spit on me, cursed me out, as I put up crime scene tape to cordon off the crime scene, yelling and screaming out of pain and anger at the sight of their loved ones taking their last breath. I never took it personally, I knew they were hurting. I remember the countless times I had to order new uniforms, because the ones I had on, were bloody from the blood of another black victim…of black on black crime. I remember the countless times I got back in my patrol car, distraught after having watched another black male die in front me, having to start my preliminary report something like this:

Suspect- Black/ Male, Victim-Black /Male.

I remember the countless times I canvassed the area afterwards, and asked everyone “did you see who did it”, and the popular response from the very same family members was always, “Fuck the Police, I aint no snitch, Im gonna take care of this myself." This happened every single time, every single homicide, black on black, and then my realization became clearer.

I woke up every morning, put my freshly pressed uniform on, shined my badge, functioned checked my weapon, kissed my wife and kid, and waited for my wife to say the same thing she always does before I leave, “Make sure you come back home to us”. I always replied, “I will”, but the truth was I was never sure if I would. I almost lost my life on this job, and every call, every stop, every moment that I had this uniform on, was another possibility for me to almost lose my life again. I was a target in the very community I swore to protect, the very community I wanted to help. As a matter of fact, they hated my very presence. They called me “Uncle Tom”, and “wanna be white boy”, and I couldn’t understand why. My own fellow black men and women attacking me, wishing for my death, wishing for the death of my family. I was so confused, so torn, I couldn’t understand why my own black people would turn against me, when every time they called …I was there. Every time someone died….I was there. Every time they were going through one of the worst moments in their lives…I was there. So why was I the enemy? I dove deep into that question…Why was I the enemy? Then my realization became clearer.

I spoke to members of the community and listened to some of the complaints as to why they hated cops. I then did research on the facts. I also presented facts to these members of the community, and listened to their complaints in response. This is what I learned:

Complaint: Police always targeting us, they always messing with the black man.

Fact: A city where the majority of citizens are black (Baltimore for example) …will ALWAYS have a higher rate of black people getting arrested, it will ALWAYS have a higher rate of blacks getting stopped, and will ALWAYS have a higher rate of blacks getting killed, and the reason why is because a city with those characteristics will ALWAYS have a higher rate of blacks committing crime. The statistics will follow the same trend for Asians if you go to China, for Hispanics if you go to Puerto Rico, for whites if you go to Russia, and the list goes on. It’s called Demographics

Complaint: More black people get arrested than white boys.

Fact: Black People commit a grossly disproportionate amount of crime. Data from the FBI shows that Nationwide, Blacks committed 5,173 homicides in 2014, whites committed 4,367. Chicago’s death toll is almost equal to that of both wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, combined. Chicago’s death toll from 2001–November, 26 2015 stands at 7,401. The combined total deaths during Operation Iraqi Freedom (2003-2015: 4,815) and Operation Enduring Freedom/Afghanistan (2001-2015: 3,506), total 8,321.

Complaint: Blacks are the only ones getting killed by police, or they are killed more.

Fact: As of July 2016, the breakdown of the number of US Citizens killed by Police this year is, 238 White people killed, 123 Black people killed, 79 Hispanics, 69 other/or unknown race.

Fact: Black people kill more other blacks than Police do, and there are only protest and outrage when a cop kills a black man. University of Toledo criminologist Dr. Richard R. Johnson examined the latest crime data from the FBI’s Supplementary Homicide Reports and Centers for Disease Control and found that an average of 4,472 black men were killed by other black men annually between Jan. 1, 2009, and Dec. 31, 2012. Professor Johnson’s research further concluded that 112 black men died from both justified and unjustified police-involved killings annually during this same period.

Complaint: Well we already doing a good job of killing ourselves, we don’t need the Police to do it. Besides they should know better.

The more I listened, the more I realized. The more I researched, the more I realized. I would ask questions, and would only get emotional responses & inferences based on no facts at all. The more killing I saw, the more tragedy, the more savagery, the more violence, the more loss of life of a black man at the hands of another black man….the more I realized.

I haven’t slept well in the past few nights. Heartbreak weighs me down, rage flows through my veins, and tears fills my eyes. I watched my fellow officers assassinated on live television, and the images of them laying on the ground are seared into my brain forever. I couldn’t help but wonder if it had been me, a black man, a black cop, on TV, assassinated, laying on the ground dead,..would my friends and family still think black lives mattered? Would my life have mattered? Would they make t-shirts in remembrance of me? Would they go on tv and protest violence? Would they even make a Facebook post, or share a post in reference to my death?

All of my realizations came to this conclusion. Black Lives do not matter to most black people. Only the lives that make the national news matter to them. Only the lives that are taken at the hands of cops or white people, matter. The other thousands of lives lost, the other black souls that I along with every cop, have seen taken at the hands of other blacks, do not matter. Their deaths are unnoticed, accepted as the “norm”, and swept underneath the rug by the very people who claim and post “black lives matter”. I realized that this country is full of ignorance, where an educated individual will watch the ratings-driven news media, and watch a couple YouTube video clips, and then come to the conclusion that they have all the knowledge they need to have in order to know what it feels like to have a bullet proof vest as part of your office equipment, “Stay Alive” as part of your daily to do list, and having insurance for your health insurance because of the high rate of death in your profession. They watch a couple videos and then they magically know in 2 minutes 35 seconds, how you are supposed to handle a violent encounter, which took you 6 months of Academy training, 2 – 3 months of field training, and countless years of blood, sweat, tears and broken bones experiencing violent encounters and fine tuning your execution of the Use of Force Continuum. I realized that there are even cops, COPS, duly sworn law enforcement officers, who are supposed to be decent investigators, who will publicly go on the media and call other white cops racist and KKK, based on a video clip that they watched thousands of miles away, which was filmed after the fact, based on a case where the details aren’t even known yet and the investigation hasn’t even begun. I realized that most in the African American community refuse to look at solving the bigger problem that I see and deal with every day, which is black on black crime taking hundreds of innocent black lives each year, and instead focus on the 9 questionable deaths of black men, where some were in the act of committing crimes. I realized that they value the life of a Sex Offender and Convicted Felon, [who was in the act of committing multiple felonies: felon in possession of a firearm-FELONY, brandishing and threatening a homeless man with a gun-Aggravated Assault in Florida: FELONY, who resisted officers who first tried to taze him, and WAS NOT RESTRAINED, who can be clearly seen in one of the videos raising his right shoulder, then shooting it down towards the right side of his body exactly where the firearm was located and recovered] more than the lives of the innocent cops who were assassinated in Dallas protecting the very people that hated them the most. I realized that they refuse to believe that most cops acknowledge that there are Bad cops who should have never been given a badge & gun, who are chicken shit and will shoot a cockroach if it crawls at them too fast, who never worked in the hood and may be intimidated. That most cops dread the thought of having to shoot someone, and never see the turmoil and mental anguish that a cop goes through after having to kill someone to save his own life. Instead they believe that we are all blood thirsty killers, because the media says so, even though the numbers prove otherwise. I realize that they truly feel as if the death of cops will help people realize the false narrative that Black Lives Matter, when all it will do is take their movement two steps backwards and label them domestic terrorist. I realized that some of these people, who say Black Lives Matter, are full of hate and racism. Hate for cops, because of the false narrative that more black people are targeted and killed. Racism against white people, for a tragedy that began 100’s of years ago, when most of the white people today weren’t even born yet. I realized that some in the African American community’s idea of “Justice” is the prosecution of ANY and EVERY cop or white man that kills or is believed to have killed a black man, no matter what the circumstances are. I realized the African American community refuses to look within to solve its major issues, and instead makes excuses and looks outside for solutions. I realized that a lot of people in the African American community lead with hate, instead of love. Division instead of Unity. Turmoil and rioting, instead of Peace. I realized that they have become the very entity that they claim they are fighting against.

I realized that the very reasons I became a cop, are the very reasons my own people hate me, and now in this toxic hateful racially charged political climate, I am now more likely to die,... and it is still hard for me to understand…. to this day.

47 comments:

Anonymous said...

This should be the real story. But it does not fit the narrative of left wing lunatics. They need to gin up their base with senseless rhetoric. It is easier to blame white cops than to face the real tragedy of black on black murder.

Anonymous said...

Well Bernie you are doing a good job of making your many right wing fanatic readers very happy. Which of your right wing buddies sent you thins story? Obviously cherry-picked from some right-0wing source.

This is the one exception to the rule that the right wing love to drag out and run with all day long.

You are better than this Bernie. smh

Bernie O'Hare said...

You are not. I got this story by looking at Memeorandum, which tracks trending stories without regard to political slant. I found the essay to be heartfelt and compelling. If it disturbs you, well that's just too frickin' bad.

Anonymous said...

Spot on! Doesn't matter what race you are, what he said here is the absolute truth. What can you argue? Factually that is.

Anonymous said...

This story sadly just encourages the nascent racism of the right wing. Because they will latch on to this diamond in coal bin, they will ignore the reality of far too many black deaths at the hands of the police. They will claim it is not true rather than try and work towards an answer. This is the salve of the right wing's echo chamber.

Tears for America

Anonymous said...

Very sad and very true. They only hear the African American voices that support their own views.

Anonymous said...

Tears for America is apparently a statistics denier. How can black males commit 60% of US murders? They only comprise 6.5% of the population. And 90% of black murder victims are slain by blacks, mostly in self defense. I cry tears for those who deny the science of statistical compilation and choose to continue false narratives, regardless.

Anonymous said...

I watched an interview of a black man with his 5 year son on CNN, others that I talked to also saw him, he witnessed the tragedy in Dallas, he was a impressive man with a stripped shirt and was very eloquent in his unbiased analysis of the racial divide, I also saw a protester at a rally in Baton rouge, who also made a lot of sense. I doubt if we will hear from them again, because they do not fit the political narrative. It did give me a sliver of hope that there are many black people who see what is being done in their name. Sadly they dare not speak out in their community or they may become a statistic themselves. We are forced to watch the self appointed spokesman for the black community of Sharpton, Jackson, and others. These people really don't like America, don't like any civil order, say they would like to have no police. No authority black or white. there are lots of places they should fit right in, Mogadishu is just one example. Centuries ago many people risked all for religious freedom, wanted to escape the oppression of Kings etc. and came here to build a safe place to live. I will gladly contribute money for air fare for anyone who want s a 1 way ticket to some third world cities without rules, they would feel right at home and would truly be free at last.

Anonymous said...

75% of black children are born to single mother households and black liberals think the confederate flag is the problem

Anonymous said...

A brilliant representation of half truths.

Anonymous said...

It's heartwarming to see the Stars & Bars crowd come out in support of this piece.

Anonymous said...

Why was it again that this guy lost his other PD job? I forget...

Anonymous said...

His Facebook page has a "sheriff david clarke for President" banner.

I think that says it all.

Anonymous said...

Very truly spoken! Black lives only matter when a white police officer has to use deadly force on a non-compliant black-man who threatens or attempts to use deadly force. Most urban police officers see death on a daily basis and do not want to be the cause of it, however, compliance, whether right or wrong, is the key to it. This is something the black community does not recognize when a white officer orders it.

Anonymous said...

It sounds like you despise those uppity darkies who dare stray away from the liberal plantation. You are upset that you've done so much to enslave them into depending upon you and then they go off and think for themselves.

Men like Sherrif Clark and Alan West are amazing men who personify the content of character over the color of skin. You should try it some time, it's nice not to live on that plantation. Enslaving is such a human rights violation.

Anonymous said...

6:16
Please identify yourself so I can send you my name . I want some of your money for transportation. I'm leaving the Valley here and going home to another Country. Did you ever hear of Cleveland.

Anonymous said...

75% of black children will be born to a woman who will raise that child as a single parent. What chance do these kids have with no father figure or discipline? There in lays the problem. No discipline.

Anonymous said...

Allen West is a war criminal who retired to avoid a court martial.

Clarke is a paid Fox pundit who has a very limited experience with the truth...

http://www.politifact.com/personalities/david-clarke-jr/

War crimes and pathological lying are conservative traits...

Anonymous said...

7:36 translation:

"I disagree with them, therefore..."

Anonymous said...

7:53 translation:

"sure, they are war criminals and liars, but they hate the same people I hate, so it's all good!"

Anonymous said...

7:53

Can you refer us to an official finding of West being a "war criminal" or are you just stating an opinion?

Anonymous said...

if you ain't white, you ain't right

Anonymous said...

Glad I left the Lehigh Valley, it's a lost cause, libtards have taken over the place.

Anonymous said...

9:57 and the entire Lehigh Valley is glad you left too!

Which trailer park in which government dependent red state did you settle in?

Bernie O'Hare said...

"Allen West is a war criminal who retired to avoid a court martial.

Clarke is a paid Fox pundit who has a very limited experience with the truth...

http://www.politifact.com/personalities/david-clarke-jr/

War crimes and pathological lying are conservative traits..."


This is what is known in logic as an anecdotal fallacy. It is a dishonest form of argument that insult your intelligence.

A is a C.

B is a C.

A and B are conservatives.

Conclusion: Therefore, all conservatives are C.

The fact that A and B are C does not necessarily mean that ALL conservatives are C.

let me give you an example of an anecdotal fallacy.

John Kennedy was a philanderer.

FDR was a philanderer.

Bull Clinton was a philanderer.

JFK, FDR and Bill Clinton weree all liberals.

Conclusion: All liberals are philanderers.

This of course is a dishonest argument.

Anonymous said...

"dishonest argument'


You mean like when you call every person who disagrees with you the 'blog mentor'?

Anonymous said...

10:03 I stayed in the LV, do not live in a trailer park, and agree that the valley has too many libtards. On a brighter note, our local congressman and many of our county elected officials are R's. So there is at least a base of reason in the area. Not all are sniveling, condescending nitwits like you.

Anonymous said...

10:31- How much are you looking to get to move to another state? We could do a GofundMe thing for you, or maybe a car wash?

In case you haven't noticed, as PA has moved closer to being a red state, everything about it is in the crapper.

Those 'libtards' you're whining about are paying all the bills while the cuntservatives bask in taxpayer funded handouts. I'd bet you're taking Medicare and SS.

Bernie O'Hare said...

I am no longer going to allow commentsthat include the word "libtard" or"cuntservative."

Anonymous said...

I can see it now.

Hillary will run on the campaign slogan:

"Medicare and Social Security are taxpayer funded handouts."

Brilliant!

Anonymous said...

Social Security is still (surprisingly) pretty solvent, but there needs to be reform or that will no longer be the case.

Most Medicare does in fact come from the tax base. Yes, you pay into it all your life, but not very much and most people pass their 'contribution' within the first few years and then it's tax dollars. And that's a good thing, I'll take taxpayer funded healthcare over taxpayer funded global police actions any day.

Anonymous said...

Why do we always hear about Social Security running out of money (which is funded by workers) but we never hear about welfare running out of money?

Anonymous said...

Maybe this gentlemans testimony can be used in the Fitsgetald case. Cops act on suspecious behavior an evasive actions. A case of wrong place and arong time now turns into a civil rights lawsuit. After flashing a gun at undercover cops, the uniform police acted with professionalism and to safeguard the public AND defendant to end the situation witbout harm to anyone. Now take the case of Allentown machette incident. The sister begged the APD to get her mentally ill brother help hours before. He was known to police for his mental illness. Seems that cops had to protect themselves, however, with the man surrounded, it seems they could have neutralized the situation without fatally shooting the victim multiple times. Maybe a civil rights attorney should look into that case, to see if there were any civil rights violations or excessive force?

alfonso todd said...

His words are definitely part of the narrative, but make no mistake, his experience does not represent all Black folk. You cant discredit others just because of another's observations.

Alfonso Todd

Anonymous said...

10:48 is a sniveling whiner, typical of left-wing loonies who have cultivated the Black Lives Matter movement. The poster is a deadbeat suffering from white guilt. I would gladly support a fund-raiser for that ilk to leave town.

Anonymous said...

6:16 describes the lawless utopia the tea party wants r9ght here. Sort of like the 1950's when everyone knew their place.

Anonymous said...

In regards to Medicare being an entitlement you are forced to go on it at 65 or upon retirement. I was happy with my private health insurance and would have liked to stay on it but had to sign up for Medicare.

Anonymous said...

You can buy whatever health insurance you want. No one makes you use Medicare.

Anonymous said...

Gee, pay an exorbitant premium for private insurance or go on Medicare which you have already paid for with taxes during your working years. You are a genius 4:10!

Anonymous said...

ALL LIVES MATTER
RE:publican redd

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Bernie O'Hare said...

9:44, I've deleted you once,and though you cleaned up your comment, I know what you were really thinking and wanted to say. You are one of the haters on the left, and add to the problems in this country. Your comments are not welcome here because you engage in diatribe, not dialogue.

Anonymous said...

"As of July 2016, the breakdown of the number of US Citizens killed by Police this year is, 238 White people killed, 123 Black people killed, 79 Hispanics, 69 other/or unknown race."

With all due respect to Officer Stalien, these stats at the heart of his assertion actually undermine his argument. The US is about 72.4% white and about 12.6% black, so while more white people are killed by police according to these numbers (which are most likely estimates, as there is no centralized record system for police violence), black people are about 3 times more likely than white people to be killed by police.

Being a police officer is a tough, dangerous job, but considering we grant them so much authority in enforcing laws, it is appropriate to intensely scrutinize them. In any case, "black on black" crime is a thing not so much because of some cultural element, but because policies regarding housing and education have deprived generations of black people the opportunities afforded to the rest of us. We could just as easily speak of "white on white" crime.

Anonymous said...

3:07 typical left-wing apologist for failures in the black community. The young punks that are gunned down every day by during dealing gang members are victims of housing and education deprivations. How about the failure of black leaders in those communities to stem the tide of fatherless families. Despite sex education in the schools and the availability of birth control the young black women have numerous babies out of wedlock with numerous dad's who cannot support them. When those kids become teenagers they are recruited by their only father figures, crime bosses, and the deadly cycle continues. White apologists treat urban blacks as sheep, with no personal responsibility.

Anonymous said...

Well said 3:07.

Anonymous said...

try a article by a white guy

http://whatever.scalzi.com/2016/07/07/police-and-me-and-philando-castile/


"I am not afraid of the cops. Never have been. Probably will never have to be. That is a luxury and privilege not everyone gets to have. I’m glad I have it. I want more people to have it, too. We’re not there yet. We can’t pretend we are."

Anonymous said...

Who enforced the racist laws of the past that have since been overturned? Laws that helped in part, create the conditions of this cops youth.

Who held the nightsticks and dogs leashes? Who killed the 3 civil rights workers?

When you won't acknowledge America's racists past and how and who enforced those laws, than you won't understand how to a oppressed community suffering because of those pass laws might think joining the Police instead of the Panthers makes you a Tom.

Sort of like a Jew becoming an SS guard to help his wretched people.

This is not my way of thinking it is my understanding of how others might think.