Thursday, April 19, 2012

Kool-Aid First NIZ Tenant From Outside Lehigh Valley

Flanked by developer JB Reilly, Allentown Mayor Edwin Pawlowski today announced the first new tenant for the Neighborhood Improvement Zone from outside the Lehigh Valley.

Kraft Foods, Inc. will relocate its Kool-Aid division to a Reilly-owned office building in the NIZ. A Kraft spokesperson stated, "We are pleased to announce that we will make Allentown the headquarters for Kool-Aid. Our market research indicates that there is a higher per capita consumption of Kool-Aid in Allentown than anywhere else in the country.

"It's a natural fit for Kool-Aid. A product that's cheap, has virtually no nutritional value, and is loaded with artificial ingredients aligns perfectly with everything we've heard about Allentown."

As part of the lease agreement, Pawlowski has agreed to appear in various media campaigns for Kool-Aid. Said a proud Pawlowski, "The transformation of Allentown is now reality!"

"I love it, too!" shouted Allentown City Council member, Chamber of Commerce Exec and State Rep. Elect Mike Schlossberg. "Look what it's done for me!"

13 comments:

Jon Geeting said...

Unfunny

Doc Rock said...

Yes, Geeting, you are unfunny!

Mark Baker said...

Good one, BO

AMOrlando said...

I get done laughing my ass off - then I read the Geeting comment: "unfunny". People can judge humor for themselves. I don't think we need Jon Geeting to editorialize it for us. Please, worry more about NYC already and leave the Lehigh Valley alone. Your socialist utopian agenda is getting old. And it obviously interferes with your sense of humor.

Anonymous said...

This is SO ironic. Browne and Pawlowski have been trying to get the suburbs to drink the Kool-Aid. Now look what happend, Kraft took it to heart.

Bernie O'Hare said...

AM, Geeting has no sense of humor. He likes t preach sermons and then wil dance on the graves of people whose political views differ from his. But humor is not in his very small bag of tricks. Because he goes to no public meetings and knows none of the players, he has nothing original to say, either. All he can do is react.

Anonymous said...

Very funny Geeting! You're the joke.

Anonymous said...

RACIST!!!!!

-Clem

Anonymous said...

So we are getting new people to drive to Allentown even day and spend money and the NIZ is bad? Do you think they will buy homes, buy cars, buy appliances, buy clothing, buy food etc? And that will have a HUGE impact on the Lehigh Valley in my viewpoint.

Anonymous said...

Kool-Aid and downtown Allentown. Talk about racial profiling.

Anonymous said...

"HUGE impact"?

Like the one in Reading, for example?

Please, Anon 1:22, go ahead and name one city where the building on an expensive Palace of Sport led to an economic revolution.

Future Downtown Arena Attendee has already tried many, many times here and failed miserably.

I say you would, too, but, please, take your best shot.

SEEN THE MOVIE SEVEN OR EIGHT TIMES, IT STILL SUCKS

Anonymous said...

"Why have the arena property supporters refused to talk about other 'success stories' across the country. Because, I suspect that they didn't bother to look for any other success stories before promoting the NIZ structure, and because those other success stories simply don't exist."

DR. STEPHEN F. THODE
Director for Lehigh University's Goodman Center for Real Estate Studies ... quoted in THE MORNING CALL (Feb 16, 2012)

Anonymous said...

I thought it was funny, I laughed, but I will not be drinking the Kool-Aid!

Ignore Geeting, he is looking for attention! Isn't that blatantly obvious?