I should just turn the damn phone off. Yesterday, on my way home from the courthouse, my cell phone started ringing, so I pulled off along the side of Tatamy Road to take the call along some freshly cut grass. I was just off the road. Honest.
Unbeknown to me, I drive right into a groundhog's living room. He must be a rich groundhog, too, because that was one deep hole and there was no way I would get out.
I inconvenienced police officers from both Tatamy and Palmer Township, who were mystified that a sober person could drive off the road and right into a hole. I'm unsure they bought my cell phone story. A tow truck eventually pulled me out.
Worst of all, this happened in my brother's truck. My Jeep recently died after 210,000 miles, and he has let me use his old truck until I find something. Don't tell him.
Fortunately, there's no law against being an idiot.