Whenever I get a chance, I like to sneak into the courthouse cafeteria at lunchtime to talk to the ladies. There are no nearby exits, so they're pretty much stuck with me.The other day, two of them started telling me about their Saturday night experience at a mixer for Lehigh Valley Singles. They met a fellow with a very thick accent who showed them that one of his ex-wives cut off a finger. He was tough to understand, but they think he suggested that's not all she cut off. They also spoke to a lady who told them what a dirty rat her husband is and proceeded to list all her medications.
My courthouse pals were also warned, by several of the women, to be on their guard for the original founder of the group, a sleaze who claimed he was divorced when he was actually only separated. He apparently was dating most of them simultaneously without any of them knowing what the hell was going on.
Eventually, the feces hit the air conditioner, and the group's founder was confronted by a horde of angry women. One of them may have wanted to cut off his thumb. He told them he was really busy and had decided to bail out. Exit, stage right! But get this! The very next day, he started another group, Lehigh Valley Singles Mingles.
As I soaked all this in, I mentioned an article I had written about Northampton County Council candidate and speed dater J.C. Kelleher.
"That's the guy!" the Northampton County femme fatales both shouted.
JC is currently the manager at Channel 69's News Traffic Center. His web page at one time had a pitch for county council. He asks us to "[h]ave a voice and speak out for traditional values for TODAY'S family."
Having heard of his extracurricular activities and multiple failed marriages, I decided to take his advice and "speak out for traditional values for TODAY'S family." He acknowledged his three failed marriages, but also told me his fast lifestyle was a thing of the past. After my blog was published, he quickly removed that "traditional values" language from his web page and demanded I explain where I came up with that nonsense.
Unfortunately for Speed Dater JC, it was still in Google's cache. I supplied him with the link.
Oopsie.
Contrary to the bill of goods JC tried to sell me, he has actually remained quite active with LV Singles Mingles. His group has ten different events this month alone, including speed dating at the Mezza Luna on the 24th. Lori purrs, "Hi Handsome!” Vivian coos, “Still love that pic of you on your motor bike! Now where is the pic of you wearing a kilt?! lol ; :) ”
JC is also the founding member of another group, LV Republicans, which now boasts 23 members.
I have just a few questions for local Republicans. "Are you out of your frickin' minds? Has it even dawned on you that people are fed up by 'family values' phonies? Why don't you just march over to the voter registrar office and announce, 'We give up.' Do you realize you are actually making Dertinger look good?"
61 comments:
ROFL!!!
I hear Ted Haggard is looking for a job if anyone wants some spiritual advisement.
Bill
And this is why I say if you want to live the single lifestyle, STAY SINGLE !!!
Alfonso Todd
There's No Business Like 'Snow' business!
Joe Kennedy, JFK, RFK, Ted Kennedy, Bill CLinton, the list goes on, none were denied office, since it was considered personal business and not about their ability to do the peoples work.
Joe Kennedy never held elected office. As I recall, Clinton was impeached.
But the difference between Kennedys/Clinton and the Northampton County love muffin is that the former had the good sense not to challenge people to speak out about family values.
I guess this is a hanging matter. If he had failed to pay his taxes, or report income, or hired illegal aliens for nanies he would be qualified to be in a cabinet position
If you like a guy who thumps that Bible yet acts like Caligula, go ahead and vote for him.
Bernie, this R is fine with JCK. "Family values" is like "change." Who knows or cares what the hell either is or means?
Barack showed us that campaigns are about style and sexiness. His shirtless beach photo still makes the heart go pitter patter.
I'm for this new approach from R's. Admit it: JC is H-O-T hot!!!
C-Ya! ROFL! LOL! TTYL!
"His shirtless beach photo still makes the heart go pitter patter."
I guess I'm gonna' have to post my shirtless beach pic. Maybe I'll pick up a few babes. (Is that sexist?)
"After my blog was published, he quickly removed that 'traditional values' language from his web page and demanded I explain where I came up with that nonsense.
Unfortunately for Speed Dater JC, it was still in Google's cache. I supplied him with the link."
This is more troubling to me than his dating practices or whether or not he has traditional values.
Yesterday you kicked rawhide from the dead horse, and today you are swinging O'Hares's Hatchet.
Busy, Busy, busy. The devil's work is never done
That's your best phoyo yet, BTW.
Is that the one you sent to JCK asking for a date?
Does LOLV know you stole her prom picture?
It is a double standard. Democrats who chase women are forgiven with a snicker and a wink. It is their personal lives and not part of their record. When Republicans have the same problem it is a real scandal and they are considered corrupt to the core.
Wow, with that "stud-muffin" elected, I might to County Council meeting more often! Yummy!!!
Anon 11:45 wrote: "When Republicans have the same problem it is a real scandal and they are considered corrupt to the core."
if you say republicans are so "scandalous" and dems get off so easy...then please tell us which major u.s. newspapers hammered republican john mccain for telling that chelsea clinton/janet reno?
go ahead....i'll wait...
...
...
...
THIS JUST IN:
There is a massive crash at the intersections of Truth Street & Phoneyness Avenue.
Also excpect long delays on the Explanation Highway.
Seek alternate routes.
.................................
Boy I also hear JC, and Donald Barnhouse are screwed. They thought Vaughn would keep stacking the studios with other right wing crackpots like them. (He did land his son a job in the Sports department ala Nepatisim)
Instead they got a few of these "young reporters" who voted for Obama (Hes a terrorsit you know! His middle name makes him one, ask Dr/Pastor Donald Barnhouse!)
And they do the damndest things, like stories that in-depth show social services are weak for local poor and that the "screw the poor!" wing of America seems to think the free market will help the poor. Only as the recent stories about local Homeless and food stamps shows, they don't.
Maybe the "Free Market" will land a date for JC!
In response to anonymous saying that it's a double standard, that's clearly bull. Newt Gingrich was having sex with his girlfriend when his wife was still on her deathbed. Yet he had the nerve to question Bill Clinton's values. Larry Craig gets caught playing footsies with a boy in the men's room and still would not leave. They finally got him out, but not without a fight.
Rudy Guilianni was married three times and still ran for president. John McCain left his first wife when he came home because she was in an accident that left her somewhat disfigured. I guess she wasn't pretty enough for him anymore. But he took care of that pretty quickly with the rich, pretty young babe he hooked up with after that, but apparently nobody was concerned with his family values, seeing as how he did manage to garner a few votes. Republicans' antics get swept under the rug just as often as Democrats if not more because they've got bigger pockets to do so. I wouldn't even care about their shenanigans if it weren't for the fact that they always act like they're holier than though, and that they never do anything wrong and look down on democrats whenever they do. Let's face it. There are are sleazeball men in every political party.
The only problem is the republicans never own up to it. When they do it, it's alright. When a democrat does it, they're heathen sinners damned to hell.
Or the hate mongering spew of that big, fat, drug addict, Rush Limbaugh. I think I'd pick hell
Oh so much venom and rhetoric!
As far as I am concerned, I know JC Kelleher, and I have no problem with his qualifications for the job. I know that right now he is living s pretty average life and that he does do a lot of fine things for folks around the Lehigh Valley.
nancys
You, er uh, sound er uh, very hawt! I'd like to er uh, take you out for some er uh drinks and perhaaaps a drive around the er uh Vinyard! Perhaps a swim? I'll be joined by er uh, John Edwards and his latest stop in his cancer-filled stormy port.
Waitress, more Chivas please! And a shorter skirt next time! Oh to be the Lion of the Democrat Party! I smell darkies burning! Is Robert Byrd playing with his matches again? That patron saint of liberalism is such a pyromaniac!
-I think I'd pick hell-
Satan called, he doesn't want you.
Nancy... sssshh!
Your not supposed to mention the 1,000lb elephant in the room
This is not about Ted Kennedy or Newt Gingrich. It is about a person who claims we need to speak out about family values but whose own record on that point is pretty abysmal. If he had said nothing about that, I would have left him alone. I ordinarily think someone's personal life is just that. But he invited the scrutiny.
Whether he is a D or an R, I don't want a person like that.
"Wow, with that 'stud-muffin' elected, I might to County Council meeting more often! Yummy!!!"
Besides, Ron giggles when he kisses.
"The devil's work is never done"
It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it.
Bernie, how can you sit in judgment on JCK. Are you the guy that has consistently been questioned about your unorthodox use of Northampton County restroom facilities ?
Wow! You got me.
Are you people freaking kidding???
Morals and scrupples aren't a prerequisit to hold any office. Take a look at who is holding the office right now?
Again, I ask, are you freaking kidding me???
If we waited for people with scrupples or morals to run for office, this place would be run by monkeys!
Lest ye cast the first stone, my friend.
At least O'Hare is using a real picture of himself. I think that is the dress they caught him wearing in the Couthouse.
It is, but I had my Spidey suit on underneath on got away. And my Spidey senses are tingling right now. Do you want me to put that dress back on?
Ahh, no.
Bernie,
If title searcher doesn't work out for you, I can get you a job with the religious order of The Society of Jesus (a.k.a The Jesuits) at Georgetown University. They still perform exorcisms on the possessed. (Unlike us, we used the word exorcism for a process in removing sin in baptism.)
There will be one condition. You have to wear that Spidey suit. That will scare the demons out of anyone.
Peace out, G! ~~Alex
Mike Fleck to announce County Executive Run on Friday with his wife Allison.
And I'm the Prince of Wales.
JC Kelleher bettr be careful. His boss Dick Dean is an uber family values christian conservative and this type of publicity from a randy employee cannot sit well. Even Rob Vaughn, an ultra-great guy is very religious and family oriented in a real way and he has some real yank at the station. This JC cat may find that his 'lifestyle' and Cahnnel 69 donot mesh well. I know Dick Dean cannot be happy witht he publicity.
Looks like JC is only a "fill in" these days.
Rick Edwards is at least a fun guy. JC is the stick in the mud.
Fleck thanks for the "Anon" post at 11:40.
I bet it will be outside and the weather will suck!
and am I alone in seeing humor in this? WFMZ is loaded with so many Conservative family values people. And their number is ......... 69!
If only George Carlin could have seen this.
"J. SPIKE ROGAN said...
and am I alone in seeing humor in this? WFMZ is loaded with so many Conservative family values people. And their number is ......... 69!"
Not for long with DTV coming.
Maybe that's why they want you to buy a coversion box, eh??
LOL, Glenn. And that "terrorist" Obama is about to ok a delay in that. It's him and the liberal media making them keep 69 longer. lol
I think they will still call themselves WFMZ 69 HD now.
69 in HD, need I say more?
And you need a box for 69, hehe!
I don't like Kelleher. But how do a lot of you argue against someone for family values hypocrisy (which last time I checked was scummy but not illegal), but support a tax cheat to oversee the IRS? Oh, yeah, that is Hussein's boy so it's OK.
That is the double standard.
I've met JC Kelleher a few times and I think he's alreight. He never came onto me.
"And you need a box for 69, hehe!"
You only use tools?
Making fun of religious people is easy and fun.
11:03
It's the religion, stupid. Ethics don't need to exist in a Godless world. It's "change" you better get used to as our death culture is exported via executive order and sloth is rewarded with the new coveting culture.
I think Fleck running for office is as good as it can get. If I thought Fleck signs on the free bridge were bad in 2007, I can't wait to see what happens in the County!
I want a debate between Fleck and anybody. That will make it all worth watching!
Praying for anonymous bloggers like the one at 1:52 PM is quite refreshing and invigorating.
Peace be with you, ~~Alex
ANON 2:05 Fleck v Bullwinkle!
I'd put my cash on the moose.
Alex - It was posted, sarcastically, by a regular visitor and devout believer to point out what has sadly become regular sport on these pages. It's a kinder, gentler version of what is often criticized here about The Morning Call's Topix Forums.
God bless you, good and faithful servant.
If you start listing hypocrites where do you stop? How bout Gunther Walsh who spouts religious and conservative diatribes daily and yet is divorced and once was arrested for beating his daughter? No he is not running for anything, but he sure works hard holding up others to standards in a very public way.
When you get right down to it, everyone is holier than thou.
Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone.
Just for the record, JC doesn't work and Channel 69 anymore. I think he might fill in once in a while, but I heard he got another job. Hopefully not around too many unsuspecting women.
ANON 3:15, I have a great pic of Bobby Gunther back in his early days on the boob tube.
I should post it.
" ... is divorced and once was arrested for beating his daughter?"
Never charged, never accused of "beating," now reconciled and very close to his daughter. Wow, how vicious; especially to a fund raising dynamo whom The Children's Home of Easton finds indispensable for his years of tireless work to provide Christmas gifts and holiday cheer for every kid spending Christmas there. The Center For Animal Health and Welfare that Bernie so kindly aided today is another regular beneficiary of Walsh's fund raising activities, as well as Animals In Distress. And how about his dedication to The Allentown Rescue Mission and other worthy causes for many years? You should be ashamed, but are likely incapable of it.
Fleck to take on Stoffa. Fleck has bossman Long in his corner. Watch out John!!!!!!!!!
Gubber Walsh should have been investigated by Children and Youth. He was dumped by Big Sisters and Brothers for his behavior.
He is a poor example and you should be ashamed to have this violent extremist represent you.
I think Heckman, McHale and Stoffa would love Fleck as an opponent. The only question is how will he word this resume.
Will he claim he landed the plane in the Hudson or was the traffic controller who showed remarkable poise.
Fleck for Co. Executive, God now that is funny. Even you O'Hare with yopur Stoffa mancrush has to say that Heckman and McHale are Presidental compared to Fleck.
All I have to say, and I am
LMFAO as I write it:
Vote FLECK
FOR EXEC!
Has a Hell of a ring to it, doesn't it? Can't wait to see who the R candidates are. I may change my registration!
I do not live in the Lehigh Valley, but I have family that lives there.
I am a Democrat, not a Republican, but I do know JC, he is a friend and I am aware of the circumstances mentioned.
There are two sides to each story. JC is single, therefore, nothing wrong with JC running a singles group, nor anything wrong with him being involved in several singles groups.
He's single and can date as many women as he wants to or can. So what.
I find it amazing that someone can post a blog and write something on the internet slandering someone just on gossip and not fact based information.
I know JC "personally" and he is quite the scum! I'm glad I was warned of his antics early on. He preys on the sympathy of women to get what he wants, telling fake stories of his family life..stay away!..don't be a notch in his bedpost!
His preaching of family values is a joke! He is a member of the Knights of Columbus that is supposed to practice family values, maybe he should relearn
their pledge... he is an embarrassment to every organization and employer.
food for thought....his running for "County Exec"..what a crock!...I know first hand he has no intention of taking office even if he won! I asked him once, what happens if you win?...he exact words were "I did this whole thing to get my name out there and as a favor for a friend, if I see that there is a chance I could win, I will withdraw immediately"...his exact words! so all of you out there who are thinking of voting for him because you believed his line of bull..you are wasting your time!!! the Lehigh Valley is on to you JC!
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